Wouldn't it be great if you could feel like you had more control over your decisions? One of the jobs that appears to be the most appreciated, even if not the most lucrative, is that of cleaning lady. I don’t know about you, but in our house the cleaning lady is glorified as a semi-deity. The feeling you get when you come home to a pristine house is priceless. Even the knowledge that, whether you have 10 kids or just 1, this cleanliness may not last the next hour, is not enough to wipe off the smile of even the most cynical amongst us. In summary, I am a big fan of the cleaning lady.

However.

Here’s what drives me a little nuts. When we know the cleaning lady is coming, we really want to maximize the work she does. That means that we need to do a cleanup in anticipation of the actual clean up! 

“She’s coming and you know how she only vacuums if the clothes are off the floor, right?” 

or, 

“If we leave it a huge mess she’ll have to spend most of the time cleaning that and won’t get to do any deep cleaning”

A question starts creeping into my head. Who works for who over here? I know I pay her so that would seem to imply she works for me. On the other hand the demands on me to prep for her coming make me wonder! 

Of course I get it. She works for me, and just to be clear again, I am very appreciative for an often thankless job that is performed. But this got me thinking about the need for clarity between employers and employees as to who works for who. And how it’s not as simple as just saying that the one who gets the paycheck will just take orders from the one who is doing the paying. And it got me thinking about another relationship…

This one is between me and myself. Yup, 2 different aspects of me. There’s the child in me who knows what he enjoys and what feels right. And there is the protector in me, kind of like the secret service to the president- very focused on safety, giving lots of orders. Here is the truth- the one who tells you “I told you so” is being extremely unfair. He or She has all the benefits and none of the disadvantages that come with giving out advice. If he’s right he can say “I told you so” and you feel like an idiot. If he’s wrong, there are no consequences at all. The Child in you rarely says “see, everything was fine and I had a great time so maybe you should just relax!”.

So next time you hear an overbearing voice bossing you around, letting you know where you’re allowed to go or what you can spend your time doing, just ask yourself- Who is that voice and who works for who?! You will feel a lot freer when you feel like you are the one who gets to choose your own destiny.